


Ghost of You

by Kaseokjinology



Category: bts, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Black Yoongi, Chef Yoongi, Heartbreaking, M/M, Pink Jin, Racer Seokjin, Time Travel, lucid dream, sin - Freeform, yoonjin - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 03:09:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20499875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaseokjinology/pseuds/Kaseokjinology
Summary: Chef Yoongi and racer Seokjin has been married for 3 years.Min Yoongi owned a restaurant and his interns always mistook his husband, Seokjin, as the head chef. Mainly just because of picking between Seokjin’s pink fashion versus Min Yoongi’s all black outfit with a black leather as a final touch, it definitely has to be Seokjin as their head chef and Yoongi could be the racer husband. Oh how they couldn’t be more wrong.They always support one another. They always do. Not until Seokjin got into a potential dangerous race. Yoongi was not happy. He doesn’t want Seokjin to go. He doesn’t want to lose his husband.Until one fateful incident leads to Seokjin saying “Tell Yoongi I might not be home tonight” and Yoongi reminiscing memories and praying to relive that day.





	1. Memories of 2013

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I wrote this one on twitter days before Festa 2019 and didn’t update it because I got too busy in Festa 😂 and mostly because I don’t think people read it lol. I hope it would do better here because it’s story very close to my heart. Also, I made this story after listening to Ghost for You of 5SOS. Thank you so much and I hope you’ll enjoy reading it!

Yoongi finds it funny how his new employees would always mistake his husband, Seokjin as the chef in their relationship and Yoongi as the racer. Yoongi doesn’t know why but Seokjin said it was because of the leather jacket. That’s how they met in the first place. 

Summer of 2013

Min Yoongi, a culinary student, running down the hallway as fast as he could because he couldn’t afford to be late in a cooking competition he worked hard for to get in. He cannot be late. Definitely, not on his first. He got 3 minutes. 3 minutes to save his stupid assfrom being kicked out of the competition. The call time would be at 8 am but the competition would start at 9 am.

He can almost see the location of the competition, he admire it for a second before running again because he literally had no time to be in awe in their set up if he’s going to pay for it at a very high price. Losing.

Another minute pass and he’s at the venue. He quickly put his black apron up covering his black polo. The roll call started and now he just have to wait for the competition to start. He decided to check if everything is complete, if he brought everything he needed. Oh shit. He cursed at himself. He forgot his lucky bracelet. He’s definitely going to lose today.

You may not believe in lucky things but for Yoongi it was his lifeline. A first timer competing with the most talented culinary students from all around the country. To say that he’s disheartened is an understatement. Then a *ting* popped, it was from his cellphone. Weird, a random number texted him.

<message>

Unknown: Hey! I’m your new roommate, I just moved in today. The land lady gave me your number. I’m wondering where you are? Like, right now? I have to meet you.

Yoongi rolled his eyes and scoffs. What is this kid doing? He’s busy. He cannot put up with this entitled new roommate of him. Plus, he already got a major dilemma here. He’s two seconds away from breaking down.

<message>

Yoongi: I’m kinda busy right now. I have a competition to starting in a bit. I can meet you later. Now if you excuse me, I have to cry for a bit.

Yoongi hit send and mute his phone. He doesn’t need anymore distractions when everything has been exactly the way he had planned.

The competition started and they have to work with a special ingredient, right pine nuts. Probably, something he never even had tasted before. Yoongi gently rubbed his forehead thinking how everything really is not getting exactly as planned.

After working with it, he decided to use it to make a pesto pasta. He’s nervous as hell, theirentrees were already being set up in their table. They’ll have a quick break before proceeding to taste testing. He’s just rubbed his forehead again sighing while getting his phone out of his pocket.

<message>

Unknown: Well ... I kind of know that. I went to our shared room and I think I came to you bedroom not knowing you already occupy the space and accidentally saw a huge sign saying “⚠️DON’T FORGET TO WEAR THIS LUCKY BRACELET TOMORROW‼️” beside a bracelet and just let me know if you still want to wear it. I could drop it off for you.

Sent: 1 hour and 30 minutes ago

Shoot!!!! Yoongi slightly screamed. Suddenly, hope sparked in his eyes. As long as he get to wear his lucky bracelet, it doesn’t have to be before the cooking or after the taste testing he thought. As long as he have it, he’s going to be fine. BUT THAT WAS LIKE ALMOST 2 HOURS AGO. HE JUST HOPED HIS ROOMMATE WOULD STILL ENTERTAIN HIS REQUEST!

<message>

Yoongi: HI IM SORRY FOR REPLYING LATE BUT JUST FINISHED DOING MY ENTREE FOR THE COMPETITION AND I WAS KINDA HOPING THAT YOUR OFFER IS STILL AVAILABLE. I MEAN IF YOU COULD GIVE IT TO ME BEFORE THEY ANNOUNCE THE WINNER IT WOULD BE SUPER GREAT AND I WOULD BE GRATEFUL TO YOU ALL MY LIFE. 

Unknown: LOL just type me the address and I’d be there in a bit!

Yoongi: OMG THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH!!!

He quickly typed in the address and pressed send. He unmute his phone, kissed the screen while locking in and silently screaming his lungs out. He got this. Min Yoongi YOU got this.

The taste testing started and the judges visit table by table. His roommate still nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, Min Yoongi is anxious again. Truth be told, it has only been 2 minutesbut who could blame him? He just wanted to wear the lucky bracelet and blame it if he didn’t win. He cannot shift the blame to the food he makes so he has to have an excuse for losing. He hates losing. And definitely not on his first.

<message>

Yoongi: I’m wearing all black by the way. Since you know, we haven’t even met. You probably don’t know who am I so... yeah all black that is. I’m pretty easy to spot, given all the people in here is wearing white. Plus, I’m really pale against black so you’d spot me in no time. Oh sneak in if you have to. I’m sorry for making you do this. I’d make you a nice dinner for 10 days!

Unknown: Got it! See you in ten.

The way Yoongi read five, his heart sank. 10 minutes is TOO LONG. Six more tables and they’re finish taste testing. His roommate would never make it in time, unless he’s a racer or some sort. But of course he couldn’t blame him because it was his dumbass’ fault.

‘Pssst’ Yoongi heard. ‘Pssst’ he heard again. He looked around trying to figure out where the sound is coming from. ‘Pssst’ he caught a man in a pink sweater, probably taller than him, frame larger than him as well, made that sound. He was extremely handsome. Suddenly, Yoongi is dumbstruck. What is this cutie doing. He’s cute but is weird af, he thought.

“All black outfit, really pale man. Hi! I’m your roommate, Kim Seokjin! Nice to meet you!” Was all he heard before mentally blacking out


	2. Summer Package

“All black outfit, really pale man. Hi! I’m your roommate, Kim Seokjin! Nice to meet you!” Seokjin said and Yoongi just stop moving with his mouth forming a not so subtle gasp. Seokjin chucked a bit before waving his hand in front of Yoongi.

“Hello?! Are you still there?!” Seokjin said while waving his hand towards Yoongi’s face. Then Yoongi snapped out of it.

“Huh? I’m sorry what?!” Yoongi said

“I said I’m your new roommate and here’s your lucky bracelet” Seokjin said while chuckling a little. Giving the bracelet to Yoongi. He gasp again and with wide eyes he grabbed the bracelet and started wearing it.

“Thank you so much! I didn’t expect you to come sooner I thought you said you’d be here at 10 minutes?” Yoongi said without looking at Seokjin, adjusting his bracelet.

“I mean 10 seconds, I’m sorry I didn’t specify the unit of time I’m using!” He said laughing subtly again. His eyes almost gone from laughing silently.

“Are you a racer or something?! Cause you know we’re 20 minutes away from this building. I’m Min Yoongi by the way!” Yoongi said finishing locking his bracelet and looked at Seokjin with a gummy smile extending a hand for a handshake. Seokjin smiled and took his hand shaking it as well.

“Yeah! you can say that I’m a racer.” Seokjin said still shaking Yoongi’s hands.

“Thank you so much again, Seokjin! Since I’m very grateful, I’ll make your dinner for 10 days! Unless you want packed lunches I could do that as well!” Yoongi said letting go of Seokjin’s hand.

“Really, there’s not need to thank me for! 10 days is too much, plus we didn’t know if your lucky charm would work right?!” Seokjin said almost a whisper to Yoongi.

“Oh I’m sure I’d work! It already did” Yoongi said with a low chuckle, eyes wrinkling in seconds.

Their tiny get to know each other was disrupted when the judges went ahead to Yoongi’s table. The tasted Yoongi’s dish and they all nodded while looking at each other casually writing his score. Seokjin is still beside him. They all smile in satisfaction extending their hand to the chef, congratulating him on this wonderful dish in from of them. Yoongi smiled and was about to accept the handshake except they didn’t took his. They shook Seokjin’s hand congratulating him.

“Very great dish! Nicely done pasta and the base is just marvelous! I won’t be able to forget it, chef ...?” One of the judge said asking for his name.

“Oh I’m sorry! HE is the chef. I’m just here for you know... support?” Seokjin said hands pointing at Yoongi.

“Yes, I’m the chef, sir.” Yoongi said smiling awkwardly extending his hand.

“Oh is that it? I’m sorry, my mistake! Nicely done chef! It was straight up perfection.” He said while smiling looking at the both of them before causally moving on to the next table. The other judges shook his hand as well.

“You have such a supportive boyfriend! He’s a keeper.” The old lady said who happens to be the last judge that shook his hand.

Seokjin and Yoongi looked at each other with a certain unbelieving look at their face then suddenly bursting into laughters.

Yoongi was right. He WON the competition. HIS bracelet is really LUCKY. After that they went home and for the next few days, Yoongi will be packing Seokjin’s lunch or maybe he could also do the dinner. Yoongi is LUCKY. He didn’t just only won the competition, he won another thing. His bracelet is REALLY LUCKY. Yoongi is lucky.


	3. Season’s Greeting’s

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He finally got into the biggest race of his career. They’ve always supported each other. It might be his only chance to get into a race as big as this but right now, Yoongi wanted him to stop. Seokjin doesn’t want to.

2019

The holidays were near, glad tidings, carols and the even scent of Christmas were everywhere. Yoongi can practically taste it. He would often joke and Seokjin would softly punch his arms for being so cocky about it.

One night, Seokjin went home screaming because of happiness. To say that Min Yoongi got so scared, he almost jumped and break the most expensive wine he ever bought in his life, is an understatement. Yoongi held his chest to calm himself down. Putting the wine bottle down somewhere safe in their counter before rushing out to meet his husband. Asking him what happened. He’s worried.

“Why? Why?! What happened” Yoongi said to greet his husband with a very worried voice. He could tell he was happy but he couldn’t be too sure. He has been married to this guy for3 years now and if he can recall correctly, this is the second time he heard that sound after he proposed to him. Yoongi only wanted Seokjin’s happiness. He would always support this man.

“Hyung, let’s sit down first and tell me what happened okay?” Yoongi said walking Seokjin through their couch. But Seokjin stopped mid way. He looked straight into Yoongi’s eyes.

“Yoongi, I got in!” Seokjin said a little breathy, still couldn’t believe that it’s happening.

“What do you mean hyung?” Yoongi said worry plastered in his face. Searching Seokjin’s eyes for answer.

“I got in! I GOT IN, YOONGI!” Seokjin said hugging Yoongi excitingly while jumping in the process of doing so.

Seokjin finally got into the biggest race of his career. He was so HAPPY. So happy that he would just want to scream at the top of his lungs. So happy that he would run all over the town screaming that he’s going to be in the most prestigious race ever that he only dreamed of growing up. It’s too much for him to handle. He was too happy that he wanted to share this moment with Yoongi, the love of his life and his confidant. They’ve always supported each other. He knows Yoongi is going to more proud of him. It might be his only chance to get into a race as big as this. Hence, he’s super happy that he was chosen. He got in. Seokjin pulled away from the hug and looked at Yoongi in the face, ready to explain everything.

“Yoongi! I finally have the chance to race for the MOST PRESTIGIOUS RACE EVER!!!!! Tell me you’re not excited for me?! WAAAAAAAAAA!” Seokjin said pulling Yoongi again in a tight hug while screaming in pure happiness and casually jumping. He was so happy.

Yoongi’s heart sank. HE KNOWS what Seokjin meant. That prestigious race is also the most dangerous one his husband had to face. His heart sank. He had heard grieving stories too many times from Seokjin’s racer friends, Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook, who attended it for the past years. It was really dangerous. Wrong move from his competitors and he could potentially lose his husband. His heart started aching. It feels as if his husband has been sent an invitation to participate in the war. He DOESN’T LIKE it. He was anxious. He KNOWS that it meant so much for his husband. But reality check, he NEEDED his husband MORE. He’s being torn apart just by the thought of saying no to his husband. That he’s about to step on his husband’s dream. He doesn’t like it. But, he doesn’t want to lose his husband more. He can’t afford taking a risk of a life without his other half, his only and only, Seokjin. 

This time it was Yoongi who pulled away the hug, he looked straight into Seokjin, as if he’s talking straight at Seokjin’s very soul. Seokjin smiles at him expectantly. Waiting for Yoongi to say ‘wow that’s great hyung! I’ll book our flight as soon as possible’ or ‘I am so happy for you Hyung! I know you’ll do it!’. Seokjin smiler wider at the thought. He was so ready to make his Min Yoongi proud.

“I don’t think you should go, hyung. It’s far too dangerous!” Yoongi said dead serious but inside he felt like being ripped apart as he watched Seokjin’s bright face suddenly turned dull, his smile suddenly turned into a frown. Suddenly, Seokjin was serious as well.

Seokjin was swelling with pride and happiness moments ago but these words be really coming from Min Yoongi? His confidant? They’ve always supported each other. There was never a time they didn’t. Yoongi saying he shouldn’t go was a big slap in his face. He doesn’t know what to say. He was utterly shocked. Seokjin was confused. He thought Yoongi would be proud of him, would be happy for him. Just like those other times. His heart sank. But what changed? Sure it’s a little more dangerous than his other races BUT this is not just a race. This is THE race. He should put a little trust on him. Whether Yoongi likes it or not he’s going to that race!

“But I have been waiting for this my entire life, Yoongi!” Seokjin said with a serious face. His voice almost broke but he managed to not let him slip. His heart sank. He’s hoping Yoongi would understand. Would change his mind. He got to convince him. ‘Min Yoongi got to learn to trust you as well’, Seokjin thought.

“I’m really sorry hyung but I can’t possibly let you race towards your death” Yoongi said with a disheartened voice. Seokjin should’ve noticed that. He should’ve noticed how much his husband is breaking just to utter the word ‘death’. It makes him sick. All he ever wanted was to stop his husband marching towards his doom. His heart sank.


	4. Bon Voyage 1

Each day they grew apart. 

No one was backing down. 

Yoongi only wanted Seokjin to be safe. He knows how dangerous that race could be. How could he not understand his heart?! They’ve been together for what? 5 years now! Married for 3 years? And all because of a simple race, Seokjin would rather fight him than understand where he’s coming from? Bullshit. 

Seokjin on the other hand, worked so hard to be a part of that race. How can he not be infuriated? All his hard work will go down the drain because of what? His husband said no? If only he trusted me more, Seokjin thought to himself. He’s been dreaming about it ever since. Seeing all those race movies growing up. Documentaries of his favorite racers. Even watching Cars for fuck’s sake. Now his keeper of a husband wanted to stop him. How can he just stop now?

The tension inside the house built a concrete wall dividing them. They may be sleeping, sharing the same bed but no one dared to talk nor faced each other. If their backs could only speak what they have in mind, they would’ve been up all night screaming and trying to make sense to their partner. Letting themselves be heard and finally knocking some sense into them. But it can’t. No one dared to talk. 

They live in the same house but barely talks. 

Usually, they would eat their cereals quietly. 

They’re still mad at each other. They refused to back down nor let the other win. ‘No, no. It’s for his own sake’, Yoongi would say in his mind. ‘I just want you to be proud of me while doing the thing I have dreamed the most’, Seokjin said his head on the other hand. What they don’t understand is why they can’t reach the other. They’re too dumb. Their pride got into their way that’s why. 

At some point, it got so bad that they sleep in different houses and spend more time with their friends than with each other. They feel suffocated in that damned house. No one was talking. As if magically, the other was nonexistent. No one dared to initiate their reconnection. No one dared to say sorry and that they were wrong. Heck, no one even dared to say ‘I love you’. Not even a single ‘I hate you’ would be heard. It’s petty and it’s suffocating. They just want to breathe some fresh air and see other people other than the new face of evil they share a home with. 

Seokjin was evil for not letting Yoongi live in peace. Seokjin was evil for pushing Yoongi in the shadow where he has to face his worst nightmare, a life without Seokjin. Seokjin was evil for not seeing how broken Yoongi’s heart upon hearing the news. Seokjin was evil for only thinking about himself and not about THEM. Seokjin was evil. Pure evil or that’s what Yoongi thought. 

On the other hand, here’s what Seokjin thought: 

Yoongi was evil for not letting him do the race he always dreamed of. Yoongi was evil for not trusting him enough that he was a responsible racer and could be world’s best if he didn’t try stopping him winning this race. Yoongi was evil for only thinking about HIMSELF and not the interest of his partner. Yoongi was evil because he was ever supportive for him. Not to count all the times Seokjin supported Yoongi but... when Yoongi said he’d quit being the head chef of a very well known 5 star hotel, a very high paying job that could make them live a life of luxury in just 6 months, he didn’t judge him and he SUPPORTED his decision. He supported him. When Yoongi said he’d open his own restaurant saying it was his biggest dream, he supported him. He was there from start to finish, ups and downs until the restaurant finally become stable and successful. He was there. He supported him. How come he cannot support him now with his biggest dreams? Yoongi was evil. Risks and dangers come in all forms and degree. Bottom line is you should still trust and support them no matter what. That’s what Min Yoongi doesn’t get. That was the reason why he was evil. Pure evil. 

One night they accidentally bump into each other while getting more of their stuffs from their house. No one talks and both rushed in getting their things and casually getting ready sleeping on their friends’ house. Yoongi got finished packing his things first. He could leave Seokjin. But he couldn’t. So he waited in the couch with his duffle bag underneath it, while Seokjin was getting ready. He wanted to talk. Or ask his husband how was he or what did he eat and where is he staying now. He wanted to check up on him. He may be so mad at him but he still loves him with all his heart. He didn’t want him to be sick or eating just fast food. He wanted to take care of him everyday. But how can he if the older doesn’t let him. It’s not just for the sake of their pride but mostly on what they’ve been fighting for in this love. Once he heard Seokjin finish packing and heard his footsteps he just looked at the older with a small smile. 

“Hi hyung.” Yoongi said with a low voice. Not making sure what to do with his hands. 

“Oh Yoongi, you’re still here” Seokjin replied panic evident in his face, he was too obvious that he wasn’t expect that ‘hi’ from Yoongi, he didn’t expect the younger would want to talk to him nor speak to him. 

“Hyung, can we talk for a second?” Yoongi said while shifting to the right side of their couch, patting the empty sit beside him. 

“I don’t ...” Seokjin tried saying but he lost all his treasured vocabulary. 

“Don’t worry. I come in peace. I won’t get mad if that’s what you’re thinking” Yoongi said raising both of his hands up while chuckling lowly avoiding eye contact. Because he knows if he does, Tears wouldn’t stop flowing and he’s doesn’t want that. Not in front of Seokjin. 

Seokjin’s heart sank. He missed him. He missed him so much. Look at him going all shy, and fluffy and soft and just cute. His heart sank. He just wanted to pat him and hug him until all his worries would be gone. He just want to kiss the man, reassuring him that there’s nothing that could keep them apart. That nothing is wrong. That everything is fine. But he would be lying. His heart sank as he just smiled, walked up to Yoongi and said “of course you wouldn’t”. 

So Seokjin sat beside him. Yoongi still doesn’t know what to do with his hands. He looked down. Suddenly, he was nervous. Seokjin noticed Yoongi tensing up, so built a courage to speak first.

“So Yoongi what do you want to talk about?” Seokjin asked searching for Yoongi’s eyes to make an eye contact. Yoongi slightly laughed at his hyung’s action. 

“How are you Hyung? Where are you staying? I hope they’re feeding you 5 star hotel foods” Yoongi started with a shy smile. 

Seokjin felt a small pang in his heart as he chuckled lightly. “I’m doing ... fine Yoongi. I’m staying at Hoseok’s right now. They were not feeding me 5 star hotel foods but it was fine, not better than your cooking but it was fine nonetheless. How about you?” He said as he tried to contain his heart aching so much as he see how much Yoongi lost some weights. 

“I’m crashing in Namjoon’s place, and I’m definitely eating 5 star hotel foods.” Yoongi said chuckling. He definitely got a lot skinner than before. Seokjin tried so hard not to cup Yoongi’s face. He tried so hard. He really did. 

But he failed. 

He cupped Yoongi’s cheeks and looked straight at his face. Scanning his face, checking every details, inspecting if everything was still intact. He frowned. “Are you sure you’re eating well Yoongi? Look at how much skinnier you got” Seokjin said his voice shaking and breaking as tears were about to flow down. But he tried so hard to contain it. He tried fighting it. He really did. 

Yoongi looked at him straight in his eyes as if searching for something. 

“Hyung, What happened to us?” Yoongi said. Seokjin stopped for a moment then let go of Yoongi’s face. He held his hands together and locked away. Does he even have the answer to this? Definitely not. Not how Min Yoongi looked like that. Utterly Devastated. His heart is aching. His heart is breaking. It’s being ripped apart.

“I don’t know” Seokjin finally said. 


	5. Run

“Hyung! When are you going back to your house? Yoongi Hyung is worried sick.” Hoseok said with a concerned look. Hoseok was Seokjin and Yoongi’s common friend. Back at college days, Hoseok was Yoongi’s bestfriend and classmate at the culinary school. They were business partners now along with Namjoon, just like what they planned years ago.

2013

“Yoongi Hyung! So why aren’t you hanging out with me anymore?” Hoseok asked Yoongi, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Hoseok, we’re literally classmates. Technically speaking, WE HANGOUT EVERY SINGLE TIME” Yoongi illiterate everything just In case Hoseok missed a word.

“You know that not what I meant we don’t GO OUT anymore! Go to places you know.” Hoseok said annoyance clear in his voice. He stopped walking.

“Leave it alone Hoseok, I’m tired!” Yoongi said fasting his walking phase and waved a hand of dismissal in the hair.

Hoseok just scoffed, he cannot believe this dude. After all that they’ve been through? After all those pesto pasta they tried perfecting, after all those scolding from their mentor and even after all the mess Namjoon makes in the kitchen. Hoseok even gave him his can of Sprite this morning. How ungrateful, he thought while frowning.

“Are you tired or you’re gonna start making dinner for your roommate?!” Hoseok said with a big grin almost accusingly. Yoongi halted and looked back at Hoseok. He glared at him while casually scrunching his nose as if he’s sending him electric waves. Hoseok just strike a pose, smiled brightly and wiggled his hips from side to side as if he was mocking him. Hoseok smiled brighter. It’s blinding really, and Yoongi was infuriated.

“How did you-?!” Yoongi said storming towards Hoseok.

“SO IT’S TRUEEEEEE!!!!” Hoseok gasped pointing at Yoongi. “HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD ME ANYTHING??!??? HOBI HOBI IS ANGRY AT YOU!” Hoseok said while rolling his eyes.

“Wait so who told you?” Yoongi asked squinting his eyes as hard as he could, as if he could see through hoseok and suddenly know who told him.

“Nothing can make me speak, Yoongi! I invoke my right to remain silent!” Hoseok said sealing his lips and rolling his eyes.

“Oh come on Hoseok, I know you’re not angry at me. You’re just hungry! So who was it?” Yoongi said cooing Hoseok as if he’s talking to a little child.

“I am both hungry AND angry. I’m hangry! Grrrrrrrrrrrr” Hoseok said turning his back at Yoongi.

“How about I make you a special dinner tonight and the night after. How’s that sounds?” Yoongi said while tugging Hoseok’s shirt. Hoseok never turned so fast in his life.

“You know, Namjoon said I shouldn’t tell you because you would probably kill him and if you failed, he would probably kill me for ratting him out. You know the drill.” Hoseok said and Yoongi chuckled lightly. Suddenly, Namjoon was in big trouble.

“So as I was saying, Namjoon saw you in front of your room as your roommate walked out you handed him a paper bag and you said ‘here’s your packed lunch for today and oh hyung what do you like for dinner?’ That’s what Namjoon said. Was he wrong? Is he cute?! OMG YOU HAVE TO INTRODUCE ME TO HIM!!!!!” Hoseok said with a tiny squeal, hips were still waving side to side from excitement.

That Namjoon talked to much, he’s dead to me.

Although, Hoseok was his best friend he didn’t bother telling him because 1.) He’s just making him a meal because he did him a favor 2.) Hoseok tends to be a little loud and too straight forward on things like this for his own liking and he might scare poor Seokjin off, he might get a different idea.

“Chill, I’m just making him lunch because he brought my lucky charm when I forgot it in our room the day I got a competition.” Yoongi said calmly.

“Then bring me to your room then! I want to meet him!” Hoseok said

“Hoseok no!” Yoongi said with a stern voice

“Pretty please! Hyung when did you have the heart to reject your lovely best friend’s small request? He’s a bad influence on you!!! I hate him already!” Hoseok said frowning

“Fine! Fine! But for a record he’s never a bad influence to me. He’s a great guy!” Yoongi said

“He must’ve been good looking for you to say that he’s a great guy!” Hoseok said scoffing.

“Hey! He really is a great guy!” Yoongi said defensively

“And how many days have you known him?” Hoseok said raising an eyebrow

“Point taken! Come on I’ll introduce him to you!” Yoongi said while yanking a very sassy Hoseok into the hallway to his dorm room.

They were almost at Yoongi’s dorm. ALMOST. When Hoseok started being feral and ran up to hug a guy??? Yoongi was confused. What does it supposed to look like? He gasps does Hoseok have a boyfriend now?! He gasps again.

“Hyuuuuuuuunggggg!!!! Wow! It’s so great to see you again! I missed you so much!!” Hoseok said still hugging the guy.

“You too Hoseok! How’s living with Jimin? Does he still get casual insomnias?” The taller man said.

Yoongi started walking up to them. Hoping Hoseok changed his mind about meeting his roommate and just go somewhere else with this guy he’s currently talking to. Hoseok looked at Yoongi and clapped.

“Oh right! Yoongi hyung! I’m going to introduce you with my other hyung! Come on faster! We don’t have forever you know!” Hoseok said signaling Yoongi to walk faster

The guy peeked at where Hoseok’s friend was walking.

“Yoongi?” The man said quite confused

“Seokjin hyung?!” Yoongi said. He cannot believe his eyes. He knows Hoseok?!!!!

“You guys know each other?!” Hoseok gasps

“Uh. Yes? He’s the new roommate I’m talking about Hobi!!!” Seokjin said with a smile.

“You guys... were talking to me?” Yoongi asked shyly, slowing as he reached them slightly scratching the back of his neck.

“So you really didn’t lie when you said you had a good looking roommate. Also, you bet, hot stuff! He said his roommate was an emo goth possibly a vampire baby who doesn’t go out that much.” Hoseok said mockingly. Seokjin’s ears suddenly turned red.

“Wow. Hyung I- wait what? You called me an emo goth? I mean I don’t mind the baby part BUT seriously emo?” Yoongi asked Seokjin coolly.

“I mean you look like you had a phase.” Seokjin said truthfully and all Yoongi have said is “What?!” Hoseok then laughed so hard he was so red.

“You guys are hilarious I love you both! Let’s talk about more stuffs inside” Hoseok said pulling both Seokjin and Yoongi inside their shared room.

Seokjin explain what happened on the day of the competition and why Yoongi packs his lunch everyday. Hoseok then believed him. Yoongi just scoffed and looked at Hoseok with disbelief. The irony really.

“How do you know Hoseok again hyung?” Yoongi asked Seokjin while Hoseok drink some coffee he made a while ago.

“Oh that! He’s Jimin’s boyfriend, my old roommate. But I have to move out because they kinda wanted to spend more time together aka live together so that’s that” Seokjin said taking a sip of his tea. Hoseok on the other hand, spits the coffee he was drinking after choking.

“WAIT YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?!” Yoongi said with wide eyes

“I-“ Hoseok tried explaining

“AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN TELL ME?!Yoongi said now standing up. Meanwhile Seokjin was still drinking his coffee unbothered

“Okay bu-“ Hoseok tried explaining but Yoongi was still not done yet.

“FOR HOW LONG NOW?!” Yoongi said

“I’ll tell you but promise me not to be mad at me!” Hoseok said

“Sure, it’s not like Joon knows about this or something. THAT would piss me off” Yoongi said sitting back down again.

“Oh about tha-“ Hoseok was cut again by a screaming Yoongi

“WHAT JOON KNOWS?!!! SO I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN’T KNOW ANYTHING?!” Yoongi said standing up again, his body heating up from the sudden passion to get Hoseok spilling his tea.

“Just chill okay? Jeez hyung! You sounded like a virgin, get laid or something.” Hoseok sighed while Yoongi sat down silently blushing heavily. “We’ve been together for 6 months now! There happy?” Hoseok said again.

“But have you kissed 👉🏼👈🏼” Yoongi asked innocently

“I’ll tell you what Jan. They don’t just kiss every single time. I’ve seen worst. Right in front of my salad” Seokjin said sipping his tea again, still unbothered.

“Whaaaat? No wonder you moved out!” Yoongi said facing Seokjin and giving him his full attention!

“Tell me about it! You know my friend, Jimin, was never the shy type but when he’s with Hobi he gets all too shy and giddy and giggly and flirty. You know what I mean?” Seokjin said shifting his full attention to Yoongi as well.

“I mean, I can only imagine!” Yoongi said crossing his arms against his chest.

“Hello?! I’m still here. I can still hear you! You guys are unbelievable!!” Suddenly,Hoseok felt invisible as his two friend went ahead and stab him in front of his face. Suddenly, he doesn’t want them together. Suddenly, he just want to run. Not now that they’re low key flirting while stabbing him. In front of his salad. 


	6. Bon Voyage 2

2019

“Hyung! When are you going back to your house? Yoongi Hyung is worried sick.” Hoseok said with a concerned look.

“I don’t know Hoseok. I really don’t know.” Seokjin said. His heart was sinking again. He wanted to run to Yoongi. He wanted to hold him. He wanted to be in his arms again. But he can’t. He knows all his resolves would be gone if he saw Yoongi about to shed a tear again. His heart was aching.

“Hyung, no offense but I think you’re both stupid!” Jimin casually said while peeling a banana.

“Jimin! Watch it” Hoseok said trying to silence the younger. Seokjin just looked at him with his eyebrows furrowed. Tilting his head slightly to the side. Listening.

“Let’s be honest hyung. Don’t you think this fight... Is too pathetic? What is this your local kdrama with slowburn and angst on the side as a theme?” Jimin said now shoving the banana in his mouth. Seokjin frowned.

“Jimin a little consideration here?” Hoseok said alertly. He was so ready to extinguish a possible fight in his household.

“What?! Seokjin hyung knew I was right, right?!” Jimin said defending himself from his boyfriend.

“I don’t think you are particularly right but I’d listen to what you have to say, kid!” Seokjin said.

“Good! Because I’m tired of hearing you say ‘oh god I miss Yoongi so much I’m gonna cry’ ‘I hope he gets to eat a lot’ ‘I miss his chubby cheeks and cute little pout’ ‘can Yoongi just let me race so we can fuck again’ stuffs like that. I’m tired of hearing those hyung. If you really miss him just go to him. You know he just wanted you safe, besides he wasn’t lying when he said it was dangerous.” Jimin said with wide eyes as if he was accusing Seokjin.

“Okay first of all, I said ‘can Yoongi just let me race so we can SNUGGLE again’ that’s just you and your dirty mind speaking, Jimin. Second of all, what are you doing Jimin? You’re my crew chief. Shouldn’t you be on my side?! Wasn’t this your dream as well?!” Seokjin said in disbelief.

“This could be true, but hyung, dreams can change especially when you already have a person waiting on you to be home with them. The dream now is to stay alive. I don’t want to be the one telling Yoongi Hyung that his husband got caught in an accident while racing, when I’m your crew chief. Just think about it hyung. Yoongi Hyung always supported you. This may be the only time he hasn’t approved of what you want to do. And mostly, he has all the reason to say no to this race” Jimin said in full sass in a matter of fact voice laced with worry on the side.

“Sometimes i wonder if you’re mine or Yoongi’s friend. But MAYBE... you’re right. I’m also getting tired of this. I’m too tired of pretending not to care!” Seokjin said

“So what do you want to do now hyung?” Hoseok asked

“I just want to go home” Seokjin said with a longing voice.

“Ting! There you go! That’s the answer. Problem solved.” Jimin said slapping the table in front of him with as if he’s a quiz master.

“That’s my baby! You’re the best!” Hoseok said walking up to Jimin to give him a tight hug!

“I know Hoseokie! I’m the best. See what marriage does to people? It clouded their minds.” Jimin said hugging Hoseok back and practically sticking out his tongue to mock Seokjin.

Seokjin rolled his eyes. He sighed. He just want to go home. Now he hope Yoongi feels the same way as well.

Yoongi on the other hand, was staying at Namjoon’s.

He cannot stay at Hoseok’s because it was too obvious that Seokjin would run to them. Currently, they were get drunk at Namjoon’s drinking counter. No one was talking. He knew if Namjoon started talking, he would knock some sense into him. What he liked about Namjoon is that the younger never sugar coat what he wanted to tell you. He is someone that you can rely on, if you wanted someone to tell you the truth, if you wanted someone to talk your struggles with ease and with no filter and would never judge you. He likes Namjoon, along with his strong sense of fairness. He could never be biased. He would correct you if he knows that you were wrong. And right now, Namjoon is the one he needed to talk to the most.

“Hyung, I think you had enough” Namjoon said removing Yoongi’s glass away from him.

Namjoon knew Yoongi had a high tolerance in drinking alcohol but he doesn’t want the older to reach the level in where he’d have mild confusion clouding up his mind. Not now that he wanted to talk some sense to him. Clearly his hyung’s heart was breaking. He knew what exactly Yoongi came here for. He was not that insensitive. He hate seeing his hyung like this. Yoongi was like a brother to him. And as a brother, he would just not want to comfort him but he hoped that he could at least give a long lasting fix to this broken mess, he called hyung. He has to reconcile them.

“Namjoon, do you think I’m wrong in stopping Seokjin hyung to his dream race? Am I the bad person here?” Yoongi said with a monotonous tone. But if you ask Namjoon he’d say Yoongi was trying so hard not to shed a tear.

“Hyung” was all Namjoon could ever muster to say. He already knew what he has to say to Yoongi. He had think about it for a long time. He even practiced saying it. But suddenly, his mind went blank. Suddenly, none of those words seemed right.

“Tell me Namjoon!” Yoongi said with a shaking voice. He cannot handle it anymore. His voice broke.

“Cause right now my heart is breaking so much. Why can’t I reach him? Why can’t I make him understand? And all I want is for him to be able to go home to me every night for the next couple of years. Is that too wrong? Am I asking too much?” Yoongi said completely breaking down. His heart was aching so much. His heart was breaking in so many different ways.

Namjoon patted his back trying to console him. To somehow comfort him. Suddenly, his words can only give so much. The only one who could completely mend his wounds would be Seokjin and Namjoon knew that. He hated how much Yoongi looked like this. He was a mess. He hated how he can practically hear all of Yoongi’s heartstrings breaking piece by piece with every cry. He got to get them together really soon.

“You’re not asking for too much, hyung” Namjoon said guaranteeing him while rubbing little circles on Yoongi’s back

“THEN TELL ME WHY DO I FEEL LIKE I AM THE ONLY ONE HURTING!! Why am I the only one fighting for us!” Yoongi said completely flopping out in the Namjoon’s chest. He caught him. He held the back of Yoongi’s head and started smoothing his hair.

“Hyung. I’m pretty sure you’re not the only one. You know sometimes, for ‘us’ to be complete, the ‘you’ have to be whole as well. If the ‘you’ is incomplete then the foundation for ‘us’ would be weak as well. Fragile, Easy to be broken or shattered into pieces.” Namjoon said

Still smoothing Yoongi’s hair.

“You know hyung, you really have to talk to Seokjin hyung not me. You cannot really get through him if you’re saying this to me? How about telling it to Seokjin hyung?! Make sure he understand? Make sure he receive it well?” Namjoon said while Yoongi pulled out from his chest and started wiping his eyes.

“You’re right. I should tell him!” Yoongi said looking away while still wiping his eyes. Crying evident in his voice.

“That’s my hyung!” Namjoon said smiling while putting a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder.

“Should I call him?” Yoongi asked

“Sure but sober up first hyung, you look like a mess?” Namjoon said chuckling lightly.

“Okay I will!” Yoongi said chuckling as well. Eyes puffy from crying. He was right about going in here. He knew Namjoon can knock some sense to him. He can talk to him with ease. He was never biased. He liked Namjoon.

He really missed his husband so much. He wanted to see him. He wanted to hold him. Be near him and tell him everything is going to be okay. Now he hope Seokjin feels the same way as well. 

Yoongi has sobered up. He got Namjoon’s approval to call Seokjin. He has sobered up.

Just when the trio was about to finish eating, Hoseok’s phone vibrated, someone was asking for a video call. It was Yoongi. Hoseok squealed in excitement and Jimin looked at who’s calling Hoseok gripping Hoseok’s shoulder in the process. Of course, Jimin got an idea who was it, he just wanted to confirm it. He smiled brightly as he gripped tightly at Hoseok’s shoulder.

“ACCEPT IT HOSEOKIE! ACCEPT! ACCEPT!” Jimin squealed. Seokjin gulped. As much as he would like to say that he didn’t know who it is, Jimin’s casual glancing at him with an excited look, gave it away.

“YOONGI HYUNG! YOU CALLED!!!!” Hoseok screamed. So that a particular man can hear everything.

“How are you Hoseok?” Yoongi asked shyly

“I’m great hyung! Did you call just to ask me that?” Hoseok asked teasingly. 😏

“No, you fool! I called because I wanted to know how is Jimin doing.” Yoongi said rolling his eyes.

Seokjin shifted uncomfortable to his chair. Jimin suddenly sat down beside Seokjin. Of course, Hoseok fixed the camera angle. In which all three of them could be seen.

“Hello! Yoongi Hyung! I’m still pretty and all. Thank you for checking!” Jimin said acting cutely.

“That’s great to hear Jimin!” Yoongi said.

Seokjin just sat there. He don’t know what to say nor if Yoongi even wants to talk to him. He frowns for a bit. Yoongi noticed it of course. He had his eyes on him. He was so ready to bust into Hoseok and Jimin’s house and carry that frowning hyung in their shared home.

“Hey Seokjin hyung! This is our friend, Yoongi! Say hi to him!” Jimin said noticing how silent Seokjin was and how he was Yoongi’s only reason to call them now.

“H-hi Yoongi!” Seokjin said shyly. Yoongi just nodded silently. Seokjin’s heart sank. He wanted to hear more from Yoongi. He wanted Yoongi to focus on him. Only him.

Noticing the awkwardness, Jimin stood up.

“Hyung! Please take Seokjin hyung home right now! He missed you so much!” Jimin said laughing slightly.

“Jimin don’t!” Seokjin attempted to stop him but to no avail. Seokjin’s heart sank. His stupid facade has been unveiled now. Now he’s just waiting to hear Yoongi’s answer.

“Tell him I missed him too.” Yoongi said longingly. Hoseok and Jimin squealing can be heard in the background. Seokjin just looked at Yoongi through the screen. Seokjin’s heart sank. How much he wanted to run to him after hearing those words. He just want to run to him and hug him. Tell him in person how much he missed him.

“THEN WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? GET YOUR ASS IN HERE AND TAKE HYUNG WITH YOU HOME!” Jimin said excitedly

“I can’t.” Yoongi said looking so heart broken. Seokjin’s heart sank. He kind of hoped that Yoongi would swoop him off his feet and take him home.

“What do you mean you can’t, hyung?!” Hoseok said confused with his eyebrows furrowed.

“I can’t. Not until Seokjin said he wanted me to.” Yoongi said looking straight into Seokjin’s eyes. Seokjin’s heart sank.

“Then take me home, Yoongi” Seokjin said staring right back at Yoongi.


	7. Memories of 2019

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Somehow things got better. They started talking more. Going out to dates. No one dared to open the racing topic. Almost as if everything is back to normal. Well ALMOST.

Within in an hour, Yoongi was already on Hoseok and Jimin’s footsteps, not really bothering to get out of his pajamas before going to Hoseok’s.

“You sure are in a hurry, huh!” Hoseok said leaning of the front door before giving Yoongi a tight hug.

“It’s about time you two fix your problem!” Hoseok added pulling out from the hug.

“I know and thank you Hoseok. I’m grateful to you and Jimin for letting hyung stay here. I’m truly grateful!” Yoongi said

“If you’re truly grateful, you should let us eat dinner in your restaurant for a month for free.” Jimin said as he reached out his arms to hug Hoseok.

“Ya! He said he’s grateful not he wanted to go broke!” Seokjin said still in his pajamas.

“Look who’s taking the hubby’s side!” Jimin said with full sass. Hoseok just chuckled loudly .

“YAAA!!!!” Seokjin shouted

“It’s okay, you can drop by our restaurant anytime that you want, I’ll give you guys free meals for 10 days!” Yoongi said with a smile while reaching for Seokjin’s things.

“YAAAAY! This is why I like Yoongi Hyung morethan that old man right there!” Jimin said half squealing, half mocking Seokjin.

“Jimin I swear-“ Seokjin was cut off by Yoongi.

“Is this all of it hyung?” Yoongi asked Seokjin.

Seokjin nodded.

“Okay, hyung. Let’s go home!” Yoongi said with a smile.

“Oh and Jimin? You do know Hoseok is my business partner right?” Yoongi said looking back at Jimin with a smug look before entering the car.

Jimin gasps and Hoseok frowns at that realization.

“Oh my! I forgot Hobi!” Jimin said wide eyes looking at Hoseok.

“It’s okay, let’s just get those from his paycheck!” Hoseok said as he pulled Jimin inside.

The drive was too long for Seokjin’s liking. He wasn’t used to Yoongi driving. Not at how he’s the racer. It was too long for his liking. No one was talking. He was nervous. He doesn’t know why. Well, not until Yoongi held his hands.

“You have no idea how much Imissed you, hyung!” Yoongi said as he tighten his grip on Seokjin’s hands.

“You bet I do, Yoongichi!” Seokjin smiled as he locked their fingers together.

The drive was too long for Seokjin’s liking. But at the same time, he felt like it was something he could forever. As long as it’s with Yoongi, he doesn’t mind taking his time.

Upon reaching their house, Yoongi got Seokjin’s things out and placed them on their bedroom.

“Come on hyung! Let’s sleep. You must’ve been tired” Yoongi said fixing their bed. Seokjin walked up to him and back hugged him.

“Can we stay like this for a little while Yoongichi? I just missed you so much” Seokjin said as he rest his head on the crook of Yoongi’s neck. Yoongi just nodded.

He missed this little man. His deep voice. His scent. His warmth against his body. He tried so hard not to let a single tear shed from his eyes. He tried so hard but to no avail. His shoulder started to vibrate as his tears flow. Yoongi knew what was happening. Yoongi felt Seokjin’s tears seeping through his clothes. He gripped Seokjin’s arms around his waist as he was trying to contain his tears as well. Bitting his bottom lips in the process. He just missed his hyung so much. Living a week without him felt so unbearable. He cannot imagine a life without Seokjin. He suddenly broke down at the sudden thought. He wailed at how much his heart was aching. How it was sinking. They were both stupid, he thought. Crying at how much they missed each other when they were holding each other’s arms right now. Seokjin held him tighter and so did Yoongi. Yoongi was right, they were stupid.

That night, after their crying session. They laid on the same bed facing each other. Eyes both puffy as they ran their fingers on the others eyes to wipe any neglected tears away. They smiled lovingly at each other and suddenly chuckling at the thought of how they were both pathetic. Helpless without each other. They were stupid.

Seokjin moves closer to Yoongi. He cupped Yoongi’s cheeks as he shortened the gap between them. Yoongi smiled at him, showing his perfect gummy smile that Seokjin endears so much. Seokjin placed his lips against Yoongi’s. He kissed him as if he’s sending all his emotions and longing for him. It was slow. Enough for Yoongi to receive all the things Seokjin wanted to send within that kiss.

Seokjin pulled away from the kiss and smiled at Yoongi again. Yoongi moves closer to him and rest his head on the older’s chest. Seokjin brushed his fingers against Yoongi’s hair. It was soft and fluffy against his fingers. Just like how it always felt. Seokjin pulled him closer. Yoongi raised his head from Seokjin’s chest to look at the older and smiled. There it was again. That gummy smile Seokjin would like to see everyday. Yoongi stole a quick peck on Seokjin’s lips in which he just chuckled. Seokjin in return kissed Yoongi’s forehead, nose and then his lips. It was chaste but still felt millions of things. Yoongi buried his head against Seokjin’s chest again. He was contented. He hoped it would last longer. He doesn’t want his hyung to ever leave again. He placed his arms on Seokjin’s waist and tightened the hug. Right now, he felt at peace. He wanted this to last forever. He knew it couldn’t. He just hoped it would last as long as he lived.

Somehow things got better. They started talking more. This morning they’ve discussed on clearing all their schedules for today so that they could go out on a date. Actually screw that, they were taking a month off. A month to make up for a week they spent alone, away from each other. It may sound extra cheesy BUT what can a man in love do when he’s over flowing with love for the other? In this case, it was both of them.

“Yoongichi! Do you want to go fishing today or tomorrow? We could just spend our first date at home you know. I missed snuggling with you!” Seokjin said with a pout still on their bed.

Yoongi chuckled as he brought breakfast in bed for his husband. He placed it down carefully while casually sitting on the bed as well.

“Yoongichi, you’re so sweet! What did I do on my past life to deserve you?” Seokjin said pouting reaching for a hug. Yoongi chuckled again as he hugged Seokjin.

“Eat up hyung! I made you some fancy bacon and eggs, vegetables on the side, pancakes and freshly squeezed orange juice!” Yoongi said as he explained every dish he made for Seokjin still hugging him.

Seokjin chuckled and started eating up.

“This taste amazing Yoongi! Here!” Seokjin said as he reach out to feed Yoongi. Yoongi just chuckled and complied to Seokjin’s request to feed him. It was funny and cute really. Puffy baby. His big baby.

“Yeah! I did great, didn’t I hyung?!” Yoongi said and Seokjin just nodded and laughed a little loudly than he wanted to.

“So what do you say should we just stay here for today or go fishing?” Seokjin asked smiling teasingly.

Puffy baby. It was Seokjin, Yoongi thought.

“I think we should just rest today! We have a lot of planning to do.” Yoongi said placing his head on Seokjin’s shoulders as he close his eyes. Seokjin chuckled again and went ahead, drinking his orange juice.

“Besides I really miss snuggling with you!” Yoongi said opening his eyes with a smirk on his face. Seokjin choked on his orange juice. Jimin, he thought. That man was so dead.

They went traveling abroad, different country every week. They also fish abroad which sounds very cool of them. They were having a very wonderful time together. Somehow, they just wanted to hold each other more than they ever did before. But the thing was no one dared to open the racing topic. It has been buried now but that doesn’t mean they won’t face it sooner or later. Right now, they were just enjoying each other’s company.


	8. Not a chapter sorry TT TT

Hello! I’m sorry but I would be updating this after September 21-22! I will be having my licensure examination then so I am currently studying right now 😭😭 I’m sorry! But I will definitely come back and finish this! I just want to reassure you guys that I’d update this after then.


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